We carry around many experiences, some good and some bad. When we associate a person with a bad experience, there is a choice to forgive or not forgive that person. Depending on the action or lack of action that happened, it is up to you to decide if forgiving or not forgiving a person is the better option. You may or may not announce that you are formally forgiving a person, but forgiveness is always a personal mental action. If you want to forgive someone, it requires two things:
APOLOGIZING TO ANOTHER
We may also associate the outcome of a good or bad experience with our own actions. Again, when we associate ourselves with a bad experience, it is up to us to decide if apologizing for it is worthwhile. You have no obligation to apologize for anything, especially not for who you are. Cultures and ideas clash. It is the beauty of the modern world that we have such diversity. Just know that not apologizing lessens the likelihood you'll be forgiven for your actions or lack of actions. Unlike forgiveness, apologies require some form of communication, whether verbal or nonverbal. There is also the option of communicating about why you're not apologizing by stating your perspectives and needs. Apologizing, or communicating about why you're not apologizing, both may save a relationship. Apologies require four things:
It is always important to forgive yourself for causing a bad experience. You can do this in the same manner as outlined above:
It may take time, and it may be difficult, but forgiving yourself or others, or apologizing to others allows your life to be lived more fully and makes it easier to live in the present moment.
My name is Sage Liskey. I am an author, poet, fine artist, designer, and activist. Born and raised in Oregon, I now travel while I write and self-publish empowering books, zines, and booklets. I founded the Rad Cat Press in 2010 to help distribute my materials with a mission devoted to creating life-changing and accessible publications for the modern world. My informational guidebooks (many of which are available for free) cover topics such as alternative and radical mental health, depression, community, sustainability, art, and activism. I offer talks on these subjects as well.
My Books and Zines
July 15th, 2018
How To Effectively Change the World workshop at OCF
Oregon Country Fair, Community Village, Yurt